A slew of sexy celebrities seem to support donning the sweater vest as a dedication to New American Maleness. See, e.g., Justin Timberlake, John Mayer, and Alicia Silverstone (the "Clueless" version). It should be noted that NAMs support the work of John Mayer because the body of a New American Male is indeed a wonderland.This delicious item, in addition to adding a spot of color to any N.A.M.’s wardrobe, offers what is truly a fashion rarity. The sweater vest provides warmth for the core of a New American Male, while at the same time, leaving the arms unrestrained to pursue a range of activities, including, but not limited to: consuming a delicious breakfast of venison and raw eggs, playing frolf, or performing magic tricks to win over a young maiden’s favor. In addition, a sweater vest is appropriate for all occasions, from a day at the beach, to the nuptials of some New American Friends.
5 comments:
This sweater vest post reminds of a very important topic that you N.A.Ms have not yet covered. What do you get a N.A.M. for Christmas? Obviously a good N.A.M. has all the sweatervests and Native American haberdashery that a goes along with N.A.M. territory, so what do you get for a N.A.M. who has it all?
Dear Queen of the Women,
You pose a very thought-provoking question. Your premise, that a N.A.M. already possess all the finer things that he desires, is dead on. Thus, when the holiday season rolls around, a N.A.M. does not expect gifts from anyone, whether they be from one his wives or lovers, or from an admirer who happens to be obsessed with his magic tricks. More to your point, if you happen to have a significant N.A.M. in your life, I think he will enjoy any item that improves his level of N.A.M.ness. For example, if he has only a distance driver and a putter in his frolf bag, splurge on a fairway driver in order to help fulfill his dream of making the Pro Disc Golf Association (PDGA) Tour.
But remember, Queen, N.A.M.'s come from all walks of life. Not every N.A.M. celebrates Christmas. In the future, please be more careful, and less hateful, with your hostile words.
Dear Legend,
Of course I did not mean to leave our Hebrew brethren out of the mix. I find it must be even harder to find 8 wonderful gifts for the NAM in your life than simply one. My apologies for instilling my Christmas-centric view point on such an obviously accepting walk of life.
Growing up (in the ROC), I had a classmate who cut the sleeves off of his sweater one day during school to create a super-cool sweater vest. I am still plagued by how much my friends and I tormented him this day and was wondering if the NAM had any views on the home (or more appropriately, English class) made sweaterv est?
NAW,
What school did this young N.A.M. attend? It sounds as if he was a part of the North Winton Village N.A.M. clan, whose bloodlines run very deep. My guess is this boy N.A.M. had begun to progress to N.A.M.hood very early in his life, perhaps to his detriment. His English class sweater vesting was a rash response to free his thickening N.A.M.ly skin.
I am not surprised you and your insensitive non-N.A.M. friends mocked this boy. He obviously had no other N.A.M.'s to roll with at this point in his life and was vulnerable to your criticism.
My advice: look this N.A.M. up on an internet search engine you trust. My guess is he will show up as either a leader in business or industry, professional video game player, or the host of a manly nature reality show on Discovery. Please keep us updated on this.
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